I am so amazed (and scared) of technology today. But, in this case, I am so impressed with the opportunity we have to talk to loved ones like they are right beside us via Skype. My parents, (and entire family for that matter), are back home in Orlando, FL. We have recently vowed to take a few minutes every weekend to talk to one another as if we were on the phone, but with the added benefit of being able to see one another. It is so cool! I woke up this morning to the angelic 2 1/2 year old voice, singing "Mooommmmmyyyyy" through the monitor. I dragged myself out of bed, got both boys in my lap, and met my parents this morning on the world of Skype. Garrett and Cole got to see their Grandma and Grandpa for a short while and we loved it.
So, my feelings of sadness for my boys not being able to grow up with their six cousins in FL is lessened now that we can AT LEAST get a glimpse into each others every day life. I personally log into skype with our MAC laptop (camera is already installed in the screen) and take my FL family for a walk around our home; I am eager to show them the changing of the leaves here soon. And perhaps a little snow this winter? Maybe, maybe not, but thank you for SKYPE. Without it, I would not have the blessed day that I now have this morning. :)
Saturday, September 20, 2008
Friday, September 19, 2008
Seasonal Friend
Can I just say that the last couple of days have been so pleasant outside; the weather is changing and it got me thinking about the word "change". I have been feeling very insecure about a few friendships that started when I first got here to Nashville, but now, those very same friendships have kind of sizzled a bit and are on thier way into what I call a "seasonal friend" status. I am very saddened by this, but I know God is in control and has a reason for everything. Should I still reach out to these ladies? I don't know...
I wrote a blog about a year and a half ago, shortly after we moved to Nashville. (May 2007 to be exact) This sums up perfectly what I am feeling right now, so I want to share it with you.
"...Okay, I very rarely get on here to talk about life and such, but today I really feel a broken heart coming on and I wonder sometimes, am I the only one out there that feels this way? If you are curious, please keep reading. I know there is a reason I felt so strongly about picking up my writing today.
When I was a child, I grew up in a wonderful home, went to a wonderful Christian school and had lots of friends. Although it was very easy for me to make friends, there was never a time in my life that I really had to work hard to meet new friends. They were all by my side, a guaranteed thing. No matter where I went or what I did, friends were around.
Do we forget how to make and keep friends as life takes us through responsibilities, new jobs, new scenery? Take yourself out of a comfort zone and then you will see your life and those around you for what they are. It takes hard work to maintain friendships, sometimes even a life time worth of patience, laughs, tears, promises, life changing events...these are the things that make friends family, and what a glorious thing it is to have friends that are like your brother or sister. It does take effort though...friends are like flames. They can ignite very fast, but burn out by the slightest thunderstorm, be a shining light, burn you, or warm you, or even stand the test of time and burn until the end.
Most of us have seen the movies where friends meet in elementary school and they live their life together, no matter what "seasonal friend" may cross their path. They still have time for their one true earthly friend, their safe house, the person that they wouldn't mind sharing their vulnerabilities with. It is an amazing thing, friendship that can endure the test of time. I thought I had that when I was young...
Skip ahead 20 years and here I am, the same friend as I have always been, just a little less naive, a little wiser and a little more experiences to add to my plate of LIFE. I have had many a broken hearts when it comes to friends and many who have come and gone, with the purpose of being a "seasonal friend".
You know, I truly believe that God places friends in our lives to serve a purpose...maybe a listening ear when no one else is around...but then when you heal, and your cries have been heard, their time with you as a friend is done and they must move on to the next in need.
Is it possible to give yourself too much? Is it possible to become the safe friend that people come to for advice or comfort, because you have proven yourself to be such a comforting arm to lean on? Is it possible to become the friend that people only come to in time of need? What happened to living life together? If this is true, whom do you go to for the same? That is where I am right now...
I just have my head full of things I want to say, dreams, aspirations and desires to share...things that only us girls like to talk about. When I go to pick up the phone, I wish I were calling the one friend, besides my wonderful Lord and Savior, that knew me like no other, that had a moment to stop what she was doing to talk to me, to put her plans and commitments aside for just a moment so that I could lean on her. The one friend that asks me how my day was and if I would like to take a couple of minutes off from life and toss my cares aside, leaning on her for comfort. Sometimes you never know if someone is burning inside, just hoping for you to invite them into your world for just a moment here and there. Friends are only a phone call away, but being a hands length away is even sweeter.
The part that upsets me the most is not knowing the difference between a seasonal friend and a friend for life. We were made for companionship and especially as females, we value intimacy and connection. We long for this and it runs so deep. At least it does for me.
I ask myself one thing, amidst all of the many questions in life, am I meant for seasonal friendships only? Am I here to be a listener and comforter? If so, when is it my time to lean? And on whom will I have the blessing to lean on?"
I wrote a blog about a year and a half ago, shortly after we moved to Nashville. (May 2007 to be exact) This sums up perfectly what I am feeling right now, so I want to share it with you.
"...Okay, I very rarely get on here to talk about life and such, but today I really feel a broken heart coming on and I wonder sometimes, am I the only one out there that feels this way? If you are curious, please keep reading. I know there is a reason I felt so strongly about picking up my writing today.
When I was a child, I grew up in a wonderful home, went to a wonderful Christian school and had lots of friends. Although it was very easy for me to make friends, there was never a time in my life that I really had to work hard to meet new friends. They were all by my side, a guaranteed thing. No matter where I went or what I did, friends were around.
Do we forget how to make and keep friends as life takes us through responsibilities, new jobs, new scenery? Take yourself out of a comfort zone and then you will see your life and those around you for what they are. It takes hard work to maintain friendships, sometimes even a life time worth of patience, laughs, tears, promises, life changing events...these are the things that make friends family, and what a glorious thing it is to have friends that are like your brother or sister. It does take effort though...friends are like flames. They can ignite very fast, but burn out by the slightest thunderstorm, be a shining light, burn you, or warm you, or even stand the test of time and burn until the end.
Most of us have seen the movies where friends meet in elementary school and they live their life together, no matter what "seasonal friend" may cross their path. They still have time for their one true earthly friend, their safe house, the person that they wouldn't mind sharing their vulnerabilities with. It is an amazing thing, friendship that can endure the test of time. I thought I had that when I was young...
Skip ahead 20 years and here I am, the same friend as I have always been, just a little less naive, a little wiser and a little more experiences to add to my plate of LIFE. I have had many a broken hearts when it comes to friends and many who have come and gone, with the purpose of being a "seasonal friend".
You know, I truly believe that God places friends in our lives to serve a purpose...maybe a listening ear when no one else is around...but then when you heal, and your cries have been heard, their time with you as a friend is done and they must move on to the next in need.
Is it possible to give yourself too much? Is it possible to become the safe friend that people come to for advice or comfort, because you have proven yourself to be such a comforting arm to lean on? Is it possible to become the friend that people only come to in time of need? What happened to living life together? If this is true, whom do you go to for the same? That is where I am right now...
I just have my head full of things I want to say, dreams, aspirations and desires to share...things that only us girls like to talk about. When I go to pick up the phone, I wish I were calling the one friend, besides my wonderful Lord and Savior, that knew me like no other, that had a moment to stop what she was doing to talk to me, to put her plans and commitments aside for just a moment so that I could lean on her. The one friend that asks me how my day was and if I would like to take a couple of minutes off from life and toss my cares aside, leaning on her for comfort. Sometimes you never know if someone is burning inside, just hoping for you to invite them into your world for just a moment here and there. Friends are only a phone call away, but being a hands length away is even sweeter.
The part that upsets me the most is not knowing the difference between a seasonal friend and a friend for life. We were made for companionship and especially as females, we value intimacy and connection. We long for this and it runs so deep. At least it does for me.
I ask myself one thing, amidst all of the many questions in life, am I meant for seasonal friendships only? Am I here to be a listener and comforter? If so, when is it my time to lean? And on whom will I have the blessing to lean on?"
Monday, September 15, 2008
scary stuff
Have you seen the new show on Tuesday nights called FRINGE? As in fringe science? I was going to post the meaning of fringe science but figured most of you already know what it means (unlike me, I am in la-la land half the time, so knowing the latest and greatest is so far from being true for me). I don't even want to research it due to the fact that I am shaking right now, and my heart is racing with fear as I write this.
Anyway, my point is this. It is SCARY. Only one word needed to describe this sort of science. SCARY, SCARY, SCARY. I am not scared of the show, I am more scared of the fact that fringe science is very real and is happening somewhere in this world, this very moment.
Sidebar - Mike and I have been contemplating trying for a third baby soon after Cole turns one year, but after the realization of how horrible and frightening this world is turning into, I hate to bring any other innocent human being into it. I will admit, openly, that I am wrong about "not wanting to bring other children" into this place. I need to lean on God's promises to us as Christians. I have been looking for some scripture to help me through this, as I am really terrified. Perhaps you are reading this thinking that I am going a little overboard, but I can tell you with my heart and soul, that I have not been this terrified in quite some time. I know we are to multiply and replenish the earth, but why am I more scared of what this world might do to our children versus what God has promised to them as a Christian? (that is if/when they accept Christ as their personal savior. I say "if" b/c even though Mike and I have vowed to raise our children in a Godly home and bring them up in the ways of the Lord, it is still their decision...this is an entirely different subject so let me move on to what I was originally saying).
I am scared and can't shake this. If you have any scriptures at your fingertips, please send them my way. I have to head to bed, but want to pick this up again tomorrow.
Good Night to you all...
Anyway, my point is this. It is SCARY. Only one word needed to describe this sort of science. SCARY, SCARY, SCARY. I am not scared of the show, I am more scared of the fact that fringe science is very real and is happening somewhere in this world, this very moment.
Sidebar - Mike and I have been contemplating trying for a third baby soon after Cole turns one year, but after the realization of how horrible and frightening this world is turning into, I hate to bring any other innocent human being into it. I will admit, openly, that I am wrong about "not wanting to bring other children" into this place. I need to lean on God's promises to us as Christians. I have been looking for some scripture to help me through this, as I am really terrified. Perhaps you are reading this thinking that I am going a little overboard, but I can tell you with my heart and soul, that I have not been this terrified in quite some time. I know we are to multiply and replenish the earth, but why am I more scared of what this world might do to our children versus what God has promised to them as a Christian? (that is if/when they accept Christ as their personal savior. I say "if" b/c even though Mike and I have vowed to raise our children in a Godly home and bring them up in the ways of the Lord, it is still their decision...this is an entirely different subject so let me move on to what I was originally saying).
I am scared and can't shake this. If you have any scriptures at your fingertips, please send them my way. I have to head to bed, but want to pick this up again tomorrow.
Good Night to you all...
chicken nuggets and fish sticks
I used to be able to write really, really well, but as I am starting this blog, I have come to realize that either 1) I have naturally lost the gift of writing or 2) my boys have literally sucked the life out of me through childbirth. I doubt the latter is true but I think those of us that have chosen to stay home with our children, somehow get lost in a world of sippy cups, fruit snacks and tonka trucks. There is no down time for reflection nor time for self expression when you are the tantrum police, chicken nugget and fish stick maker, time out monitor, diaper conisour, maid, teacher, playmate, boo-boo mender and best of all, comforter. So, with that said, perhaps one day, during my one minute break, I can sit down with my 'now' cold cup of coffee and amuse you with my mommy talk. For all of you moms that are partly intrigued with blogging, come back to see me soon! Until my next 'minute', I pray that you are able to keep the peace in your homes and make the very best chicken nuggets and fish sticks.
Love, Stephanie
Love, Stephanie
Saturday, September 13, 2008
Dear Lord...
Please give me the strength and guidance to make it through today. I am awake but so very tired and worn. This week has been the most exhausting ever, but I know there is a time of peace and rest soon. In your son Jesus'name I pray.
Amen
Amen
Friday, September 5, 2008
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)